Friday, January 20, 2012

Negativity....And What To Do About It

Negativity is everywhere.

We're all guilty of it.  You've heard the phrase "misery loves company?"  It's very true.

But when it comes to saving your own life and changing your lifestyle, negativity has no place.  It must be banished forever and not be tolerated in any way, shape or form.  Your mindset on a daily basis is critical to your success.

So what kind of negativity am I talking about?

Sabotage. Face it, some people like us the way we are.  People don't like change.  Perhaps your partner thinks you'll leave them if you lose weight.  Maybe somebody close to you enjoys putting you down because they can't do it themselves.  Either way, watch out for sabotage.  People always offering you food, for instance, trying to tempt you and enable you into failure.  I've run into it before and I simply confront it head-on: "I appreciate the offer, but I am never eating that. Thank you though."

Put-downs. Don't stand for it.  This takes many forms, but the basic thrust is the person putting you down doesn't think you can do what you're doing.  Or perhaps they can't do it themselves, so they put you down to make themselves feel better.  The code words and phrases for the putter-downer are things like "you need to be realistic" and "you can't do this on your own." Again, just like with the sabotage,  shut them down: "I am changing my life and I would appreciate you being more supportive."

Fatism. It is an absolute irrefutable fact that the last acceptable form of discrimination in our society is the mistreatment of the overweight.  I will debate this issue with anyone who cares to try.  It isn't right, but a large portion of society sees big people as less than a human being, if they see them at all.  I've experienced this first hand.  When I weighed 577 pounds, many people wouldn't even say hello to me.  Now they're my best friend.  But what they don't realize is I have a mental list and they're on it.  So don't tolerate it from your friends and family. You are due the same respect any other person is and don't tolerate the jokes, the put-downs or the comments. You are on a mission to change your life and you will leave the doubters behind.

And one more note about people.  Early on, I realized that just like an alcoholic has to ditch their drinking buddies to get clean, I had to do the same thing with my eating buddies.  I don't mean to sound drastic, but it had to be done.

When you change your lifestyle, you are changing your life.  You are becoming a different, healthier person.  That goes for the mind and the body.  Your transformation will be the result of your own positive energy and anyone that is not on board with that 100% has to go.


  1. Great post! I appreciate it. Sharon

  2. I hear that. Slowly but surely I have been trying to remove the negativity. It popped up recently and I dealt with it for the night. But I have a suspicion that I may have to cut the tie sooner than expected. Leaving "friends" won't be easy, but it will be necessary.